Segment 25 – Do you have a Love-Hate Relationship with the question “Where Are You From?”
“A Third Culture Kid (TCK) is a person who has spent a significant part of his or her developmental years outside the parents' culture. The TCK frequently builds relationships to all of the cultures, while not having full ownership in any. Although elements from each culture may be assimilated into the TCK's life experience, the sense of belonging is in relationship to others of similar background.” – Dr. David C. Pollock.
I was recently at a friend’s BBQ party with my family. The food was great, the music was lively, the children were having a blast and the most common question one could hear in virtually every corner of the garden was “Where are you from?"...
Some responded in Spanish, others in French or Dutch, and of course, yours truly in English. I heard parents calling to their kids to be careful in French, Spanish, Dutch, English and Arabic languages. I heard Spanish versions from Columbia, Equatorial Guinea and Spain. My acquaintance sitting to the left of me was Dutch, and his wife Columbian; they got a chuckle when I suggested that their spoken language, Dutch, sounded like a softer or smoother version of German. I told a story about an American friend of mine to the Dutch man, while trying to describe my American friend, I heard myself saying… “He’s American, looks like you in terms of features, but smaller in height”. [I wasn't trying to stereotype; it’s just that this Dutch guy was really tall!]
The hosts of the party were very internationally interesting too. The lady (my friend) was raised in The Netherlands with a Dutch mother and a father from Saudi Arabia. She met her spouse, a Polish man, in Amsterdam, and currently lives in Madrid with their 3 children. The children go to an English/Spanish bilingual school, and they speak English at home. Wow! – so these kids get to grow up with influences from 5 different cultures and languages. This brings me to most interesting factoid of the party – the children. I can say that every child at that party (there were about 20 kids) is a Third Culture Kid (some even fourth and fifth culture).
I first heard about this Third Culture Kid phenomenon from my friends in my book club. While I knew first-hand about growing up in a bi-cultural home; I never realized the potential implications of what life would be like for my own children when we decided to move to Spain. My first thought was “great an opportunity to learn Spanish”, but actually it has become much more than language. Kids in a third culture deal with integration into the local culture, while also trying to understand their parents’ cultures. As parents, we try to balance the line by embracing the local culture, while also teaching our respective native cultures. In my case it is even more complex as I try to remind the kids about both the American and the Thai cultures. Good grief!
Culture and language are only part of the picture. Education and history are another. So will our kids learn about Cervantes, Moliere, Shakespeare, and Hawthorne or Emerson. Many parents in this same dilemma are so busy adjusting to cultural parenting norms and differences, there hardly seems time to even begin tackling the finer works of literature and art unique to their native cultures.
Of course there are many positive impacts on Third Culture Kids:
- TCKs are often multilingual and highly accepting of other cultures.
- TCKs tend to come from families that are closer than non-TCK families. They have a smaller likelihood of having divorced parents since divorced parents are unlikely to allow their former spouse to take their child to another country.
- TCKs typically have a global perspective and are flexible both socially and intellectually, and able to comfortably interact with those who think and behave differently.
- They tend to get along with people of different cultures, and develop a chameleon-like ability to become part of other cultures. Adapting to new situations quickly and with confidence is no problem for third-culture kids.
- Excellent communication and diplomatic skills are typical of third-culture kids due to their experience abroad.
- Education, medicine, business management and highly-skilled positions are the most common professions for TCKs.
The main challenge:
Many third culture kids face an identity crisis. They don't always know where they come from. Meaning, while they may know the nationality listed on their passport or the country where they visit grandma and grandpa, they often don’t really identify on a deep level with one particular country. Such children usually find it difficult to answer the question "Where are you from?"
Top 10 signs to tell if you are a TCK:
10. You can swear convincingly in at least five different languages.
9. You often use foreign slang when speaking English, which makes you unintelligible to most people.
8. You’re really good at calculating time zone differences, because you do it every time you call your parents.
7. You’ve spent an absurd amount of time on airplanes.
6. Your list of past boyfriend’s/girlfriend’s nationalities reads like a soccer World Cup list.
5. Your circle of close friends is as politically, racially, and religiously diverse as the United Nations.
4. You get nervous whenever a form request that you enter a “permanent address.”
3. You’re a food snob because you’ve sampled the best and most authentic of every possible type of cuisine.
2. You convert any price into at least two different currencies before making significant purchases.
1. You know better than anyone else that home isn't a place, it’s the people around you.
All my life, I’ve had a love-hate relationship with the question “Where are you from?”, and still today, I never just say one country. Now, my children face the same questions; we prefer to say that we are citizens of the world.
… Stay tuned for the next Segment of HT Localization Presents Language Translations for Real Life Series, where we’ll continue … with more stuff.
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This article was written by Rachanee Thevenet, Co-Founder of HT Localization. Rachanee is an Asian-American expat living in Spain with her family. She loves all things international including food, art, literature, culture, languages and people. She has years of professional product marketing expertise and global expansion experience.
HT Localization, LLC. is a worldwide translation & localization agency providing a full range of professional language translation services, including social media localization, marketing translations, website translations, software localization, eLearning materials, documentation translations, etc. With locations in the US, Spain, France, Zambia & Thailand, and coverage across all languages and most industries, HT Localization is well positioned to provide around the globe services for all translation needs.
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